11.02.2011

What They Don't Tell You...


Is that when you have kids, the mom guilt will be bad enough to paralyze you some days.

Let me illustrate:

Today, Lexi had a minimum day. That means she starts school at 9:45 a.m. rather than the usual 11 a.m. Today, I was feeling particularly yucky and wasn't moving too quickly. We had breakfast, got dressed, and still had a few extra minutes before we needed to go. So, I asked the girls if they would be ok with me taking a lightening fast shower while they played (this would be day 2 with no shower my friends - don't judge - you know you've been there). They said yes. I stuck to my promise and was done in a flash (ha! pun fully intended).

As organizing a group of young children tends to go, we ended up totally eating up our free time trying to get ourselves ready to leave. As we were donning backpacks and running out of doors, I realized I had forgotten to make Lexi a lunch. I told her she would get to buy lunch today and she said that would be great. She asked what they were serving and I didn't know, but they tend to have multiple options so we decided she'd be able to find something that would work.

Fast forward to 1 p.m., well after her normal lunch hour and it's time to pick her up from school. On the way home, I have the thought: you better ask her about lunch. So, I did. They had tacos. She tried one bite, but didn't like it. The rule in our house is you must try one bite and even though she wasn't being supervised by mom or dad, she adhered to the rule. And, she didn't like it. They also served broccoli. She loves broccoli. Surely, she's had something to eat, right? Well, the broccoli was cold.

What did she eat for lunch? Milk. MILK.

Can I tell you how overcome with guilt I was at this discovery? Had I not taken the shower, I would have had time to make her a good lunch that she would have enjoyed. She wouldn't have had to watch the other children eating their yummy lunches while she had a yucky taco and cold broccoli. My poor little Lexi would have had something besides MILK to fuel her little body while she was working hard at school.

Of course, I made her a lunch as soon as we walked in the door. She was happy and seemingly no worse for the wear.

Me? Well, I've been beating myself up about it all day. That is the gift of mom guilt. It's the gift that keeps on giving (even when your children have totally forgotten or didn't even notice in the first place.)

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What started as a way to communicate with far away friends and family has become a place for this horse trainer/HR manager turned stay at home mom of 3 girls to hold on to a bit of her own identity. It's my take on the ins and outs, the ups and downs, the thoughts and feelings, the mistakes and triumphs of this family as we bumble our way to eternity.