A Day for Dad

Father's Day was quiet. And by quiet, I mean free from tantrums, yelling, time outs, crying and all other unpleasant noises.

We all overslept in the morning and I made cinnamon rolls anyways. We were late to church, but the kids were excellent. Addie even took an hour long nap. Lexi played quietly while the talks were given. I asked, "Who is this child and how long can you stay?" A good friend played with Addie in class so we actually got to hear the lesson - we even made some comments.

Then, a real miracle happened. Everyone took naps. All of us slept for two long hours. The Riddle house was totally silent.

We had meat and potatoes for dinner. Every man's dream, right? Strawberry shortcake for dessert. In between, we played outside. Lexi produced Allen's fathers' day cards with fanfare as she held them up and waved while yelling, "Ta Da!" when taking them to him.

We quietly celebrated the man who's made our lifestyle possible. The kids rolled on the grass, the garden grew, the horse watched by the fence that Allen poured hours of work into. We ate at the table he provided for us. He read to the girls and tickled Addie's chin. He played golf with Lexi on the lawn that took months of thought, design, planning and execution. And then, so I could call my own dad, he did the dishes and managed the kids. Without complaint, or eye rolling, or huffing.

That's Allen. He works hard for this family to enjoy lots of nice things. He softens to soothe a boo-boo, imaginary or otherwise. He gathers us nightly to kneel in family prayer. I hear his voice coming down the hall as he sings hymns to Lexi while tucking her in to bed. He wakes in the night to usher her back to bed. He wakes early to make sure we can be comfortable while he's away at work during the day. I didn't realize it, but he'd been working in the yard before work to clean up a little so that I would enjoy our yard more during the day. He feeds my horse every morning so that I don't have to try and fit it in after the girls are up.

He goes to work everyday. And I mean, everyday. Allen doesn't take his work lightly. He's stayed at boring jobs that seemed like they would go no where because he knew it was his job to keep us secure. But, he leaves his work at the door when he comes home. At one point he was given this advice when he stated he needed time to de-compress after getting home from work: the woman asked him, "How long is your commute?" Allen told her "45 minutes." "Well, sir, I imagine that is all the time you need to de-compress. If it isn't, park around the corner and sit in your car until you're ready to come home. But, when you walk through that door, be ready to be a dad and husband again." Allen took that advice to heart and hasn't failed us yet. He walks in the door, scoops up Lexi, gets on the floor with Addie, and jumps in to start his second shift.

He has a lot of try and a sincere desire to be the best dad possible. He doesn't rely on the "Well, I'm a guy and that's how we are" excuse. He wants to help. He wants to be aware. He is sensitive to the girls' needs and doesn't make them feel silly for being girls. He validates their feelings whether he thinks their valid or not. He acknowledges them. He accepts their emotional tendencies. He lovingly teaches them to work through the feelings and find solutions.

Allen is a great dad. We're very grateful for the many roles in plays in our family. I'm grateful he is willing to do what needs to be done without confining himself to traditional roles. He'll go outside and dig trenches and work all day long, but he'll also fold laundry or dust or do dishes. He isn't choosy about where he'll lend a hand. If something needs done and he can do it, he'll do his best. He's teaching our girls to be helpers; they aren't above the jobs that need to be done.

And the most important thing Allen does for his girls is respect me. He shows affection, he laughs with me, and uses kind words when talking with me. He supports me as a mom and as a woman. There is no greater gift a man can bestow to his own children. Our girls will grow up valuing women and mothers because of their father's influence. They will seek out men who will do the same. They will feel honored and cherished because of their divine capacity as daughters of God. For that, I am extremely grateful. I want nothing more for my kids than to know their worth. Allen does all he can to make sure they always will.

And so, on this one day Dads finally get a little credit, we want to thank Allen for the endless efforts he makes. We all love and appreciate what he brings to this family. Happy Fathers' Day.