It Only Took Five Years

I finally made a trip to see my great friend, Brandi. The last time I had seen her was at Lexi's baby shower. She drove out from So Cal to NM, complete with pink crystal in the trunk of the car, to help Marti host the shin dig.

Now living just outside of SLC, she and her fabulous family have matured into an awesome and super fun group of people to be around. We spent way too many hours up past midnight, saw her oldest daughter off to prom, and laughed and cried until we peed our pants passed out.

Bran, at work.

Aubree getting ready for the prom. Oh, will she have a story to tell her own daughters!

Makensee. She's 12. Yah. I know.

Connor, Aubree and Al.

Brandi with Connor waiting for Aubree to leave for her extra special prom.

Awww. Sisters.

Like, how beautiful is this girl? Her date was a total toad, too.

He'll look back and wonder how in the heck he ended up on a date with her. Probably the best night of his night. Even if they got to the dance at 9:45 and it ended at 10. Yes. It ended at 10.

On my way to the airport. I just love those mountains.

 It had been way too long. I had a great time and will NOT let another five years pass before I see them all again.

In Case You Were Wondering

Click on image to enlarge.
*Image not to scale.

March 28

The last night Allen and I were actually in the house at the same time and put the kids to bed together.

In Which I Brag About My Kid

Emily has started talking. I probably shouldn't be surprised; she's known how to use that voice since day one. But, I have to admit, I'm a little impressed. Not yet one, she can already say some words and a few phrases:

- Uh-oh

- Mama! (she yells this at the top of her lungs)

- Dada

- Hi Dad! (we made her say it 3 times 'cause we thought it was a total fluke)

- All done!

- Thank you.

To prove her awesomeness:

How We Roll

We understand death for the first time when he puts his hand upon one whom we love. ~Madame de Stael

The third week of March I got a text from my sister. Usually, her messages make me laugh. This time, the news was grim.

My Grandpa George (mom's dad) was sick. He'd gone in because of some pretty rapid weight loss and found out he had advanced liver and pancreatic cancer, several blood clots in his lungs and an aortic aneurysm. He was told he had three months to live at best. They admitted him that night to treat the blood clots.

My grandma, who has advanced dementia, was without her full time caregiver. And, Grandpa would never be able to care for her again. In day's time, our whole world was flipped upside down and turned inside out.

With every member of the family reeling, Marti and Brian stepped in and started getting the business side of things worked out. Grandma was admitted to a long term facilitly. And, after not seeing any changes for the better, the doctors pulled Grandpa off the blood thinners and told him he, too, would need to be admitted to a facility.

He went in to see his doctor about weight loss and hasn't gone back home. He has since moved into a lovely home near my mom's place. The same place where Grandma is. They share a room. It's very nice for what it is. The hard part for Grandpa is that his mind is not ill. He wants to do. Wants to help. Wants to LIVE. But, his body has reached it's mortal finish line. While he's been gracious about the whole thing, I'm sure the idea of your own mortality has him thinking a bit.

When we realized how sick he was, we packed up and took off the next day. My cousin, whom I hadn't seen in 18 years, met us there. My dad flew up. We descended upon my Grandpa to show him his family and to love him.

They held hands for a large part of our drive.

We drove all night hoping to make great time while the kids slept. That did not happen. We had chains on for 3 hours over the Sierra's. And the kids? They did not sleep. Neither did Allen. Or me.

We let off some steam at the Case Ranch.

Played with Rocket.

Spring had not sprung in Idaho.

Nana horsing around with Shawn.

Grandpa Phil with Addison and Lexi.

Grandma Leona. She doesn't know us. We call her by her first name or Mrs. George. She is much more receptive to that than trying to call her Grandma. I asked her if she'd take a picture with the kids (she adores kids) and she said yes.

Grandma discussing something of great importance with another resident.

The staff was very accommodating. They gave the kids a toy and let them run in the yard for hours. Here's my cousin, Andrea's, son Ashkon playing with Lexi and Addie. He and Lexi were  born 10 days apart.

Ashkon racing for that ball!

Flying high.

It's no secret that family tragedy brings out the best and worst in people. Marti had been juggling a lot of the administrative tasks for the family and had received some heat. Lots of cooks in that kitchen. She took it like a pro and didn't feel like kicking any shins ever! (K. That last bit was sarcasm. Extreme.)

The great grand kids. Emily, Addison, Ashkon, Lexi, Azy, Asha, Grandpa and Grandma.

The grand kids. Marti, Traci, Grandpa, Andrea and Grandma. Just a side note: we're missing: Nicole, Stephanie, Melissa and Tanya. Yah, all grand girls.

Grandpa, Grandma and Kellie.

Emily, Traci, Lexi, Grandpa, Grandma, Allen and Addison

Azy, Asha, Shawn, Grandpa, Ashkon, Grandma, and Andrea

Traci, Addison, Allen, Shawn, Andrea, Ashkon, Azy, Asha, Kellie, Grandpa, Grandma, Marti, Emily, Brian and Lexi.

Grandpa and Grandma

Grandpa Phil George.

While the reason for this trip was morbid and sad, the visit was extremely fulfilling. I'm so glad we chose to brave the weather, fight through hours of chain laden blizzard conditions, stay an extra two days in various locations and drive for a gazillion hours to have seen him. And talk with him. And just be. With him.

48 Hours

The last have been a bit rough. Where shall I start? Hmmmm.

How about:
- Allen left Tuesday at 5 a.m. for ABQ. He doesn't come back until Sunday afternoon.
- In a great coincidence surely guided by the hell-gods, it's my time. You know, time.

Dude.

- We got back the Friday before (two days before he left ya'll) at 5 p.m. from a last minute trip to see my dying Grandpa in Idaho.
- Did you see that my Gpa is dying? Yeah. So, um, that pretty much bites ass. Lots of ass. Big, hairy, cancerous ass.
- We were gone for 6 days. We had a (great and thank you to everyone who helped) birthday party the day after we got home.
- So, I'm on my own with the kiddos trying to recover from our unplanned trip and a birthday party.
- It's my week to carpool.
- I'd been doing fine until Thursday night.
- Then, I got this text: haven't talked to you all week! Are you sure you're up for watching the kids tomorrow?
- Screeching halt. What kids? Who has kids? What in the name of Sam Hill are you talking about?
- Yeah. So I totally, happily offered to help out my SIL and take two of her kiddos for the morning. Like two months ago. Except I forgot. And I wasn't in the carpool yet. And I can't put all of the kids in the mamma mobile AND get the carpool girls too. My SIL has a job. Yeah, so now she's trying to get her regular sitter to work on her day off and rearrange her job because my brain fell out.
- Another mom (who has 5 kids bytheway) graciously agreed to trade me days and even had a smile on her face this morning. Tragedy averted, but there was much stress and guilt involved.
- Gpa Bob was visiting so I decided to take Davis for a moonlight bike ride. He hadn't been out all week.
- I crashed on the bike.
- Before I even got out of the garage. (STOP YOUR LAUGHING. Stop it right now.)
- I ran into a stroller on the right.
- And then a bar stool on the left. It tipped over and I flipped over it.
- And hit the table saw.
- That the new plants were sitting on. They fell.
- And the case of Aquafina sitting on the ground fell over and all of the water bottles went rolling down the driveway in a bazillion different directions.
- Then I caught my toe as I was jumping over the stool, bike and water bottles (so what if I was wearing flip flops) on the spokes and ripped my toenail back and up and it was bleeding from underneath the nail.
- Of course I looked up to see if anyone saw. DUH. (If anyone did they kept their laughter on silent or I'd of had to fist fight them with my bloody toe.)
- We still went on the bike ride. With blood dripping from my toe and the nerve endings screaming out loud.
- As we were coming back into the garage, the bike let out a moan, then clanked, dropped it's guts on the floor and the tires stopped spinning. No, the chain didn't fall off. I think the gears ATE the chain. Um, sure, I'd love to try switching the gears. IF THE LEVER TO DO THAT ACTUALLY WORKED.
- By now, you must see how frazzled I've become because of all the YELLING.
- Addie lost her pacifier. Hello, unplanned weaning. Can you say rhymes with "want to commit suicide"?
- I dropped the stroller on my toe. Yes. The bad one. Duh.
- Lexi asked to have a camp out. And since I'm the most awesome single parent in the history of the world, I said yes. So, we went to the store. Me and all three of the kids.
- And got ourselves $70 worth of needed and un-needed groceries.
- And as we were checking out, I realized I'd forgotten my wallet.
- I FORGOT MY WALLET.
- And they are so nice they suspended my transaction.
- So we all (me and the three kids) went back home and got the wallet.
- And it was 6:20 and they were starving so I grabbed juice boxes and snacks.
- Lexi squeezed her box and it sprayed juice everywhere.
- I had the mamma mobile washed and detailed yesterday.
- We went back to the store, I paid for our groceries and unloaded them.
- As I was putting a bag in the back, the shopping cart careened off of the curb and crashed into the car.
- It left a 6 inch scratch. No, it didn't rub out. It scratched my freaking truck.
- While I was trying to get Emily dressed, Addie was misbeaving and figthing with Lexi.
- We'd gone over this particular offense about a million times. So, I spanked her bare bum.
- She dropped to the floor and screamed.
- And then she stood up and PISSED on the floor.
- So I had to spray her off in the shower. She hates the shower.
- While I was drying Lexi's hair, Emily starting drinking the shampoo.
- No, I'm serious. She drank it.
- I irrigated her mouth and brought everyone downstairs.
- Then, I saw that Emily's hair was all frothy.
- So, I had to wash her head in the sink that is full of dishes. Dishses that have ketchup on them.
- The smell of ketchup on dishes makes me gag.
- Then, all three of the girls wanted to cuddle but I could only hold one at a time. So, I explained that while I held Lexi, Addie would cuddle Emmy. And while I held Emmy, Lexi would cuddle Addie. And while I held Addie, Lexi would cuddle Emmy. And that worked ok until Emmy kicked Addie in the face and Addie started crying and drooling everywhere.
- Then Emmy had her own meltdown that included throwing the nearest toy three different times, rolling on the floor, kicking, crying and picking up said toy again just so she could throw it down. She's not even one.
- I haven't showered for 2 days.
- My toe still has the original blood on it.

p.s. I've hired a babysitter. I have a 30% off coupon for the Gap outlet. It's gonna be all good. All good.

Lexi's Got Talent

A few weeks ago, I received an email that went something like this:

"Your child has signed up for the upcoming Primary Talent Show. Please confirm and get them practicing! We look forward to all of the great acts!"

Um, Lexi?!?!?

Turns out she had, in fact, signed up and was very serious about her talent. When I asked her, she confidently told me what she was going to do. When I asked her if she wanted to practice, she assured me she already had her act down pat.

The night arrived and I was getting a little nervous. I mean, let's be honest, we all know how these things tend to turn out" Some kid runs up there, stares into the crowd like a deer in the cross hairs, mom whisper yells "Come on honney. You can do it!!!", and said kid runs out crying. The audience lets out a sympathetic round of applause and every parent secretly gives thanks that wasn't their kid.

I yet again asked Lexi if she wanted to practice jsut one more time. "NO MOM! Will you just please turn up the music?" (Ke$ha, in case you were wondering where her taste lies.) Hey, every artist has their THING to help get them into the zone. I wasn't about to mess with hers.

When it was her time to perform, she calmly walked up to the front and looked around. She got the attention of the nearest adult and requested the microphone. You know, 'cause, she wasn't going to strain her voice or anything. And, she let 'er rip.

Watch out Babs. You got a young 'un on your tail.

An Actual Conversation

Allen: {triumphantly spraying 409 and wiping down island counter} Done!

Traci: {pointing to huge-can't-be-ignored gob of soup on counter next to oven} So, um, I guess you're not cleaning this?

Allen: {shocked} Whaaaaa? That's totally out of bounds.

The Eye of God

Netlore Archive: NASA photo of the Helix Nebula taken by the Hubble Space Telescope.

Insert theme from Twilight Zone here.

Happy, Happy Birthday!

Can you believe this was 5 years ago?

And this was 4?

For us, it seems like just yesterday.

So quickly you have gone from our NICU miracle to a loving, sweet, dynamic (almost) kindergartner.

We've always known you are a special spirit. But, to see you grow and blossom into who you have become fills us with a love that isn't easy to articulate.

Your first response is always kindness.

You never miss an opportunity to dance.

Especially in the rain.

You never withhold affection.

You are a thinker. You ponder the welfare of others. You are creative and definitely inherited some engineering genes.

You are a vibrant young lady with a heart of gold.

You are loved and cherished. You are an empathetic soul that seeks to bring comfort to others. You are smart and driven.You are helpful and at the ready to lend a hand when someone is in need. You are sensitive and worry about the world and your loved ones. You are innocent and trusting. You are a cuddler of the best kind. You have all the potential in the world.
 
While the days may, at times, seem long the years go by like sand through our hands. We've blinked and you're on your way to school. To start your own journey. You will knock their socks off. Blow them away. You will change lives. While there may be a few potholes or detours along the way, there will be many scenic views and vistas.

We look forward to the ups, blessings, and success that you'll know. We will be here to help dust you off after the downs, help you put on the armor for the trials, and help you see the opportunity hidden in the failures that will be written in your book of life. We love you so very much and all that you mean to our family.

 Happy Birthday, Lexi!